Somehow a lot of thoughts are swimming around in my head.. I guess this post is just cataloguing them in an attempt to organise my messy, messy mind haha..
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Studio has ended! Wow! Honestly I have mixed feelings.. Feels like it just passed in a blur, at the same time, that it has dragged on for so long.. I feel relieved because it has ended, frustrated because again I didn't learn anything much, confused because I wonder if it's my fault or my tutor's fault that some periods of the studio were just a mess, and that not much came out of it in the end.. Still I'm glad that I did what best I could.. I fought, fought, and fought when giving up was the easy option. (At one desperate point I calculated whether my CAP would still be ok if I just slacked and aimed for a D grade..Haha.. It would! But am glad I didn't take that easy way.) In a weird way this semester taught me to be humble, because it was just so difficult to grasp what's happening in the studio, and to predict my tutor's reaction, that I had to throw away any confidence I have in my design and even myself. Well studio might not have been great, but yeah ok maybe with a bit of a stretch I can say it was good.
Still, one of the jury for the final critique panel was my old tutor who inspired me so much.. His studio was the time when I stayed in school the most often, usually two, three days in a row even on weekends, yet I felt so much satisfaction at the end of it.. When he was sitting there amongst the judges I felt like just kneeling down and begging him to accept me back to his studio hahaha.. Oh well, but even if I'm not on fire for studio, I do enjoy learning about plants and landscape, and I'm looking forward to working in this field. Guess that settles it.. One more year of struggles!
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I'm 24 now! Hm.. I don't feel any different ahaha..(Though the other day someone said I have "blossomed".. wooow.. such a compliment!) Should've posted something on my birthday I guess but that was in the middle of final design, assignments etc. Glad for my 24 years so far.. Been a really good life, blessings upon blessings.. cliche as it is, I guess what's left is to be more of a blessing for others.. Make 'm laugh, as I've often tried to do =D
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Official capoeira training is now limited to once a week in headquarters, no more NUS session (About the only bad thing in this long-awaited holiday), and I feel rather restless.. Too much energy during the week though come Friday I'll sweat and pant it all out! Still need lots of practice with the basic kicks.
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Wonder if I put too much private material in this blog, though I'm ok with people reading it. The weird part comes when people whom I don't think I know well, or know me well, starts talking or chatting to me about things I write in my blog.. (In case you're sensitive, if you were amongst my secondary school friends, JC friends, architecture friends, french friends or ex-travel partners, if I've talked to you about personal problems before, then rest assured I don't mean you). It's just weird, because for me, reading someone's blog and knowing that person well is really not the same thing, and asking personal questions without knowing someone well is a bit too much.
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Love the weather these days. Perfect for sleeping, reading, and night swimming.
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