Sentosa

..After being very, very prejudiced against Sentosa for a very long time (Sentosa = the epitome of everything artificial in Singapore), right now my perception of it is a bit better. When one visits it after staying away for 5 years, and then only with a high-octane-fun group of friends, then it is actually enjoyable.

Alright, the next scheduled visit is in 2015 =D

A Moon, Some Friends, The Sea

Somehow, after capoeira mini-training and supper, I ended up agreeing to go and watch planes taking off near Changi boardwalk with three capo friends.. Besides, one of them was so kind to "tumpang" me on his motorbike.. Which was how we ended up chatting and staring at the sea until almost 4 A.M.. and well.. The orange moon, the stars and the sea wind created a perfect atmosphere to talk 'deep' things... so...

Me: *After elaborating on the bad points of staying in Singapore, and in turn got 'served' some bad points about Indonesia* "You know what, only in the last one year have I felt like I can be in Singapore, like this can be home instead of just a place of transit.. Though I'd still prefer not to stay.."

T: "Wow, only one year? How long have you been here?"

Me: "9 years.."

T, F & K: "Nah Shiela, you kena the LKY trap already! Oh no! Don't stay, why stay in Singapore.."

Me: "Hey! Don't talk! You know that capo and capo friends are major reasons why I stop thinking of Singapore as just a place of transit and start really enjoying my life here! I'm just glad I can find a group of Singaporeans I can click with!'

K: "Well, this guy's half-Filipino, this one's half-Jap, and I'm hardly Singaporean.. We really don't count..."

Me: "Uhm... ya hor... Aw shucks..."
__
That aside, despite usually thinking of Singapore as just your efficient but inhumanely sterile city, last night (and morning) was the first in a long, long time I felt that Singapore still holds some magic. You know, the kind of magic that makes you feel a place is quietly glowing, and you just want to stay calm, not wanting to disturb that beautiful quiet.. That magic abounds in Paris, so much so you can't escape it. In Hanoi, it was of a more down-to-earth, grittier variety, while in Singapore... well.. it's so rare that I learned to treasure the few places and people that makes me feel such magic..

OK we're veering into cheesy territory, forgive me.. Ah but, I'm glad to have found another little unusual piece of Singapore, and of course, glad for the company. It's always rather funny how people you've known for years remain acquaintances while some people you've met for just awhile become trusted friends.

To end the night, my friend "tumpang"-ed me all the way from Changi to Toa Payoh.. and hey it was such a great experience riding through deserted highways across half of Singapore haha..
The wind, the noise.. And it makes me happy how things and buildings that usually look familiar now just passed as a yellowish blur (dim road lighting, mind you).. I felt like I was in a different Singapore, one more calming, and interesting..

Hm.. I 'kena' the LKY trap, indeed...

Wanderlust..

"Travel is fatal to prejudice, bigotry, and narrow-mindedness..."
- Mark Twain

The holidays are coming! (A friend told me, though, "You gotta get over your mistress first..")
Ah well, freedom is virtually 5 days away.. Yay!

Anyway, in line with my newfound appreciation of Singapore, actually I fully intended to just stay here and take it slow.. I imagine having lots of time to raid the library, to revisit my favorite ulu places around the island, to take up French and Mandarin in my own time again, to sketch, to paint, play the piano, cook..

BUT! Some capoeira people are planning a trip to Bangkok and inviting people along.. I thought, well, why not, since it's just a 4 days trip. Then..I went browsing for Thailand travel guides in the library...and it made me want to backpack large swathes of Thailand hahaha.. After all, we might as well make full use of the carbon footprint of our flights, right?

So then.. Somehow a thought popped into my mind: "Hey what about Cambodia? Angkor Wat?" I looked at the book shelf.. Tons of books about Thailand, but very few about Cambodia.. That settles it: Cambodia here I come! Previously, hesitating whether to go because I couldn't find a travel partner. (I'm bold enough to backpack Cambodia alone, but I don't have the guts and the heart to tell my parents I'm backpacking Cambodia alone huhu..) That's settled for now, though,a friend's joining me and I think it'll be great fun! Yay!

Wwll, what's 2 weeks of travel in 3 months, I thought.. Then, some friends were talking about the Shanghai World Expo and before I realized it, I was sms-ing my dad, "Dad, what do you say we go to Shanghai to see the World Expo?" My fingers moved on their own I swear! Dad's reply "Of course! You take care of the timing and tickets." I gotta admit that having a Dad that dotes on you and likes the same things you do is kinda nice.. I was already imagining going down museums and checking out old buildings with my Dad telling me Chinese history...

...when my mom calls, "Ching you're going to Shanghai with Dad? I'll join you. Let's go to Suzhou as well.." Waa.. Told my mom that the condition for her coming along is: "No shopping" hahaha.. This will be a cultural and history trip since both me and my Dad are Chinese culture fans =D

...so much for staying in Singapore hahahaha... The whole month of June I'll be hopping around: Sg - KL - Shanghai - Suzhou - Hangzhou - Shanghai - KL - Sg - Bangkok - Siem Reap - Phnom Penh (?) - Bangkok - Sg... plus maybe some Northern Thailand or Canmbodian cities.

Oh, wanderlust!

Home At Last?

As usual, too much coffee since tomorrow is interim submission.. Resulting in a somewhat reflective mood haha...

Hmm.. these past 2 weeks.. I got the strange feeling that, at last, I'm settled down in Singapore.. Like, I really appreciate the way Singapore works, and I admit that the city is beautiful.. I enjoy the familiarity, the calmness, the privilege to hear multiple languages being spoken and meet so many nationalities since Singapore is a point of transit... Ironically, this renewed appreciation partly comes from my desire to get out of Singapore often and just travel.. After seeing how barren cities can be, like Manila, and how bloody freezing cold climates elsewhere can be.. How boringly one race/language most other countries are .. well, every time I'm basking under the sun surrounded by lush raintrees, I feel happy... Every time I hear the MRT announcements in 4 languages or see advertisements in various languages I appreciate them..

Another part of it is that, finally I've found a community of interesting people to hang out with (CS!) and something outside studies to be passionate about (capo!). As much as this sounds like a cliche, it's true that the people make the place haha.. Went to some hang out places I've visited so many times, but somehow they feel really different since I was with a bunch of new, exciting people.. Singapore, my epitome of everything boring and artificial, is starting to give me a very different impression..

Was doing my design work, looking out at the green expanse of grass outside studio.. and feeling content, just content.. Suddenly staying for another 3 years in this sunny little island doesn't seem so bad at all..

Hmmm.... should I be happy with this unexpected development or be bloody suspicious that the gov***m*nt has been putting some stuff to screw my brain cells in the drinking water....?

Westerner? Me?

I'm a Westerner now. Yup, you read that right. Am a Westerner because I just moved to the Central part of Sg to the Western part, near Jurong =D

ok, since the lame joke is outta the way... am gonna write about the moving out process.. It's been years since I really moved house and it feels like a lot of fuss... but am done! The new place is pretty cool, on the 21th floor, n most importantly just 15 mins from school. Quoting a friend, "Now you can go back more often to take a shower...." No, no. I am determined to sleep well this semester, which means no staying in studio!

That aside... these are the stuff I brought in the moving process:

- 1 big luggage of clothes, toiletries, electronic stuff (laptop, camera, chargers), towels

- 2 small boxes of food stuff

- 1 plastic container of drawing materials and paper

- 2 small luggages + 2 big plastic container + 2 backpacks of books...

....I realize I really have a problem moving with all my books huhuhu.. and I didn't even bring half of them! Left some at my old place and sending about half back to Indonesia...

During the selection process where I was sorting out which book to send back, I had lotsa difficulties... Classic bookworm-with-little-time syndrome.. "Send this back to Indo? But I really want to read it again.. this is my favorite book...." Huhuhu... In the end I had to get though and decide to send almost all my fiction books back to Indo, the argument being, I can easily borrow fiction from the library, and there are always tons of new titles for fiction anyway..

That leaves me with non-fiction books, art and architecture books, and indonesian fiction books (difficult to find in library! I have a good reason!).... Well...and some fiction books that I really, really like...

After the sorting I piled them high in my room and suddenly was struck by a thought: "What if I send them back and the cargo got lost in the middle....? After all, I'm sending these to Indo so they will be handled by an Indonesian agency at some point or other.....*yea I totally don't trust Indo post office*... What if I lose these books? And some of them are like, really really my favorite..and some are really meaningful gifts, and like, some are really difficult to find now... What am I gonna do if I lose them...?"

In the end I resorted to photographing the books pile by pile so at least I'll know just what are the stuff I'm sending back huhuhuhu...

Farewell, my little darlings... Be brave, and be safe.....

Taxi conversations

I've always liked talking to taxi drivers, especially those who have more interesting points of view and not just complaining about the government in general (and saying Indonesia is creating trouble..). 3 days ago I had to take a taxi from school because I missed the last bus after MLA barbecue... and what followed was one of the most bizarrely interesting conversations I've had in a taxi..

Some excerpts....

Taxi uncle (TU) : "Eh girl, you study NUS ah? wad do you study ah?"

me: "Oh I study architecture uncle..."

TU: "Eh, that means my guess is correct lah! I knew you study architecture, you go the architect face!"

me: *feeling super happy but a bit confused* "Hah? Got such thing like architect face ah? Really ah uncle?"

TU: "Ya lah! I know the architect type one.. I work in building industry 28 years already ok, always work with architects one..."

me: "Oooo..." *hoping that at the uncle has good memories working with architects and not think we are a bunch of concrete-obsessed megalomaniacs..*

. . . . . . 

TU: "Eh girl, I tell you something ok.. Today you will learn a lot from uncle...You know what is 'HR'?

me: "Human Resources?"

TU: "No....It's actually 'Human Robot'!"

me: "Ha?"

TU: "ya lah! You must work work work very hard, if you don't work you get fired. Of course human robot right!"

me: "Hooo ok..."

TU: "And you know what is 'HB'?"

me: "HB? human bondage?"

TU: "You think lah..if you can guess before we reach Toa Payoh, means you are very smart.. ok I give you clue.. human robot right, don't care about other people one... but people must be caring, correct or not?"

me: "Ah...HB is human being?"

TU: "EH?? how you know? wah! smart girl! Come, come i shake your hand!" *and this is the bizarre part..he actually extended his hand to the back seat and insisted on shaking my hand... thank goodness we didn't have accident huhuhu.."

. . . . . . 

TU: "You know ah girl, actually I work on a lot of buildings in Singapore.."

me: "Oh ya? Which ones uncle?"

TU: "Like Chinatown point,you know or not?"

me: "Oh my church is there! "

TU: "Oh ya? You know those big pillars in the building, got 8 pillars.."

me: "Ya ya can see it from the emergency stairs behind my church.. all the way from roof to foundation right?"

TU: "Ya...and each pillar is 2m diameter... new technology at that time you know, I went to Kobe specially to get the concrete and steel.... eh, and girl, I tell you a secret ah..."

*to uncle if you read this..sorry but this is really too interesting I can't keep it a secret...*

me: "Wah, what secret uncle?"

TU: "You know ah...under those pillars..got 10 kg of gold..."

me: "Serious??!! But why put gold there??"

TU: "Don't know lah, last time for feng shui lah..."

me: "Eh but serious ah uncle? Gold under the pillars?"

TU: "Ya they put at the foundation under each pillar... you go there lah with a gold detector I'm sure you can detect.."

me: "Hoo ok..." *formulating a plan, just in case next time I would be in desperate need of money*

. . . . . . 

*I forgot why and how... but somehow we ended up talking about couples in Singapore.. and dating...and the conversation got to SDU, the official government agency to matchmake singles huhuhuhu..."

TU: "Eh girl, you know what SDU is?"

me: "Social development unit?"

TU: "No....I tell you what it really is: "Single, Desperate, Unwanted"

me: "Waaa..hahahaha... nice one uncle.."

TU: "Ya you learn a lot from uncle right, girl.."

___

Yea, I did =)

Taxi uncle: "So, you are taking a Master's at NUS?"

Me: "Yes uncle..still 2 years, very long..."

Taxi unce: "But it's good you know..when you finish, the government will help you find a boyfriend."

me: "Huh? Wad? Hahaha seriously uncle?"

Taxi uncle: "Yes it's true!! It's because the government want the smart people those degree people to marry degree people also..."

me: "Wow.....ok......"

__

Saat lagi naik bukit Kaliurang yg lumayan terjal sama sepupu2, dan ada yg udah ngos2an...

Guide: "Udah, ini puncaknya udah deket kok..."

Sepupu: "Bu ini turunnya.... ah nggak jadi deh..."

Me: "Napa lu?"

Sepupu: "Engga gw mo nanya pertanyaan yg hampir stupid..."

Me: "Hampir stupid? Halah apaan coba.....lu mo nanya apa emang?"

Sepupu: "Bu, ini turunnya gak pake naik kan yah?"

Me: "Hm....iya sih, hampir stupid..."

__

On Bimbos

OK I should be studying for Structures exam tomorrow, I really should, but before that..... a video clip on Sg bimbos....



"How do you play naughty?"
"Maybe...use my eyes to.....give electricity....."

Waaaaaaaddddd??? Hey the clean energy problem just got solved! Woohoo!

Home (?) at last...

"Travelling - it gives you home in a thousand strange places, then leaves you a stranger in your own land."
- Ibn Battuta

Back in Singapore... I have to say that it's been pretty cool... I miss Paris, yeah, wished I'd have kidnapped a baker so I can breakfast with baguette every day...but well, one can't have everything in life, and life in Singapore is indeed already pretty good...

Touchdown-ed n Changi airport, and somehow, there was a big grin on my face....hmm...familiarity does have a calming effect...the airport felt so cosy, so recognizable, so.....unthreatening.... I guess on one side travelling excites and stimulates, but it feels good too to be in familiar territory... let's see how long this effect lasts before I start missing foreign cities, foreign languages, foreign people...

Oh but the way I ogled at the food sold in shops and hawker centers these 3 days...could be called criminal gluttony...I mean..chewing on sushi while leering at carrot cake, after eating cheng tng, before heading home to dinner? Thankfully it was only for the first day.... I intend to slowly, really slowly, savour back the sights, sounds, and tastes of Singapore, just so I'll have a lot of things to do before I'm back to feeling I know this city-state like the back of my hand...

One thing I noticed that's kind of creepy... was sitting in the hawker center, in the midst of people talking, buzzing sounds, and after some time I realised...I'm hearing French!!! As in, my brain is trying to make sense of the noise around me by forming French words, even though what I'm actually hearing is a melange of English Singlish, Mandarin, Hokkien, Malay and goodness knows what else.... Either my poor brain refuses to accept the fact that it has to hear Singlish from now on (No offense but it's not exactly what one would call beautiful language...), or it's screwed up from hearing too much French guttural "r"s and nose vowels....

And whatever people say about Singapore being hot and humid, these days I'm enjoying the weather...To be able to wear shirt and shorts without fear of freezing to death...ahh... I felt so light I was half jogging when I went to buy groceries.. Yes, I don't fear winters now, I actually like it.. and yes, snow is beautiful...but I'm still very much a tropical person... Now waiting for the first rainstorm since I'm back...which would be perfect to take a nap....aaahhhhh.....

Oh, and taking about buying groceries...the funny thing is I started noticing products that I found in France...especially in the dairy section...I mean, I never knew they sell camembert and brie (types of popular French cheese) at the grocery store! Well most of the other cheeses come from the UK and Spain....but still, vive NTUC Fairprice!

Well, well....still very much enjoying what's there to enjoy in Singapore...in retrospect, it was really lucky to leave Singapore for quite long when I had my Vietnam withdrawal symptoms and couldn't really stand being here. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, as the saying goes.

Am in the middle of arranging my stuff..books, mostly...haih... Somehow my room doesn't feel like my room if the books are not properly arranged... On my first night back, I just couldn't sleep, and I spent some time wondering why...surely not the bed because it was comfortable...surely not the air because there was air-con....and then it somehow just hit me that I couldn't sleep because the shelves were bare, and whatever books were there weren't arranged according to size and category (yeah, actually, I just realised that I'm particular about that...). So, from 1 AM till 5 AM I took out my darlings from the boxes, patted them, browsed them, and.... arranged them according to category and size... no, I'm not yet so fussy as to arrange them according to Dewey's decimal system...but maybe when I have time...

As for now, it's great to allow myself to be swept along the usual rhythm...Chatter and banter with Edo and Ren, eating great Indian food (the vendors actually told me that they haven't seen me for a long time! Ohhh how I miss them too...and their cooking, actually hehehe...) before studio, borrowing new books from library then shutting myself up in my room to read them, walking along green, grassy paths and admiring gigantic tropical trees......

And yet, deep down, memories stay.... it's weird to think that this time last week I was still somewhere in Paris, walking along the snowy banks of the Seine...yet I'm sure I was there...and those memories enrich me, shape me, change me...in so many ways, whether deep or shallow...

But let's keep that for another post!

Fragging

Decide to try a new way of blogging, which I will tentatively call fragging. It just means I'll be writing down fragments of my conversations with people, fragments of thoughts, fragments of books I read, fragmens of life...

Ok confession time: I'm gonna frag because it's much less of a hassle than doing a whole blog article analysing something, but I don't think fragging is a lazy man's way of blogging...at the very least, if I can frag every day it would mean every day I'm communicating with someone, *hopefully in a meaningful way and not just in a nonsensical sense..*, thinking, reflecting, connecting....

I think it'll be kinda fun too for people to guess who am I conversing with, in what context are things said, whether there are double meanings to it....
Oh and I'll be using the initial "S" for things that I say =) Guess I really am an ass sometimes...and the other person will be referred simply as "O",as in "Other" hahaha...not very creative..

Anyway yeah, the first frags, from yesterday:

"Newspeak. Doublethink."
-1984, George Orwell (currently reading it)

"Big Brother is watching you!"

O:"..at the end of the book, 1984..."
S: "No! Don't spoil it!"
O:"No,no..I just want you to know, there is one paragraph at the end, and when you read it you will think "Man this guy knows the truth...", and then you will say that "Man, ****** knows the truth.."

"....comme les francais adorent les greves.." ("..like how the French love strikes..")

S: "...Singapore is like a newspaper, you know...you read it, you get all the facts, but that's it, who wants to read newspaper over and over again?"
O: "Haha...ok...I like that comparison...It's your own? you have copyright for that?"
S:"Nah....But anyway,Paris...it's like....hm....it's like a really nice novel....."
O: "You read it chapter by chapter...."
S: "Yea, and after you are done, you can open it again, read it again, and you find new things you don't notice before, you find that sentences can mean other things..."

S:".....I guess, people are looking for someone..."
O: "Wait, wait, someone or The One?"
S:"Hahaha.....Someone... People are looking for someone who are different from them in the right way, but also similar to them in the right way....because to have someone be so different from you..well, you just won't connect... and to have someone be so similar...it would be boring....so you gotta find a person who is different from you in just the right amount, but similar in just the right amount.."

".....in the first relationship, people are always clumsy...."

"...after you know someone for long...yeah...maybe things are not so new and interesting anymore, but you also gain a lot of things...."

"....you could have realised that earlier....."

Funny way kindness works....

Had a nice morning.. went to Toa Payoh library to photocopy some stuff, and in the library, as in many places in Singapore, the photocopy machine uses cashcards.

When I was in the middle of photocopying, a lady came and looked around, and apparently she did not know how the machines work. Since she didn't have any cashcard, she asked my help to photocopy some pages. Well, no problem. I've been a recipient of people's help so many times so I guess it's my turn to do some helping. She ended up insisting that she should pay me eventhough I kept refusing. And she gave me more than was needed. *Look, I really did try to refuse, alright..* Then we had a chat and it turned out she had a small juice bar so she asked me to come so that she can treat me a drink...

All well and good...After saying I'd drop by and thinking what stroke of good luck I have, I continued my photocopying...Some minutes later, 2 schoolgirls came and apparently they've never photocopied in the library also, cuz one of them was holding cash and looking confused. Oh well, now I can use the money given to me to do some more good...So I helped them photocopy their stuff, and in the middle of doing it, another lady came to the photocopy room... I handed the photocopies to the girls and assured them that no, I don't need payment, then I turned to the other lady who obviously did not know about cashcards also since she stood there looking at me, a bit confused. Why stop at helping 3 people, right? So I asked her to give me the pages and said I'll help her...She said, "Oh, thanks a lot! So do you work here?" "Uhm..no, actually..." After I'm done photocopying her stuff, she wanted to pay me also,more than the actual price....insisted that I must receive the cash since I've been very helpful *I'm not being very humble here, am I..*. We chatted for a while too..she just arrived from the USA *I thought she was from China..huhu..* and she told me that in the USA you don't have to pay for photocopies in the library...Wow! Singapore should emulate that! ;p

Anyway after all that...I continued my photocopying, while idly thinking away..and then I realised that, after helping 4 people photocopy their stuff, I felt happy for helping, got a free drink invitation, and still ended up making some *unintended* monetary profit! Hm.... Now if that's the way kindness works everytime, I'm sure Singapore doesn't need a "Be Gracious" campaign or whatever..

Hm... it's funny, really...Singaporeans often joke, jibe or complain and self-deprecatingly admit that theirs is an apathetic,kiasu *scared-to-lose* society, but after living here for so long, I came to think that the veneer of a cold, impersonal, don't-bother-me-I'm-zipping-thru-life attitude in this society is just that: a veneer. And beneath, one finds that there are kindness to be had, after all.. That given the chance people still practice not what's profitable, but what's commendable.

Even if the commendable turns profitable, sometimes... Should I set up shop as a photocopy assistant in Toa Payoh library?

A Little Paradox

*Disclaimer: This is my point of view, being a foreigner that has spent 8 years here, afraid of being Singaporeanised but just recently noticing just how Singaporean I am already..*

Let's compare Singapore to Indonesia. First, Singapore:
1. Singapore = safety, convenience, predictability
2. The whole of Singapore panics when Mas Selamat Kastari escaped, giving an insight to just how safe the country is expected to be.
3.Standard of "education" is high and school is done very systematically.
4. Standard of living is very high. Starvation is virtually unheard of, extreme poverty does not exist, free entertainments and community clubs are everywhere for people to enjoy.
5.Singapore has not experienced any major natural disasters and - in my opinion- it's unlikely to experience it barring any freak accidents.

Despite these standards and achievements, Singaporean students are among the most stressed in the world (There's even a hotline for stressed primary school students), the workers "live to work",
Singaporeans reportedly have very little sex *translate: time to enjoy the company of their spouse and strengthen their marriage*, and the national hobby besides 'eating' seems to be 'complaining'.
More Singaporeans are becoming paranoid about getting married and having kids, and more often than not the deterrent is cost. The general consensus is that people live to work...because there's almost no other 'worthwhile' pursuits, and people ask "Which primary school/secondary school/junior college are you from?" when they try to get to know you, and -i feel - ultimately gauge your value. *because it's deeply entrenched inside the Singaporean mindset to look for achievements*

Now, let's look at Indonesia:
1.Indonesia= chaos, crime, corruption
2.The whole country is infested with terrorists, terrorists-in-disguise-and terrorists wannabes
3.In many cases,teaching is a career people go to if they're either hopelessly idealistic or has no other choice. Corporal punishment still used in schools, standard of education low and number of illiterate people high.
4.Standard of living varies from extreme poverty to extreme riches, with the brunt borne by the middle class, as they will be target of attacks from the poor yet can't "protect" themselves like the ultra-rich.
5.....transport incidents by land, sea and air.. earthquakes, tsunami, forest fire, flood, bird flu, political riots, tribal wars, ethnic and religious disputes.. you name it, we have it..

And yet... Indonesians are not so stressed as Singaporeans *I immensely enjoyed my chilhood in Indonesia where playing is a normal activity kids do and need not be rationed..."ok you study 4 hours then play 2 hours,ok! no playing on weekdays!"*, people are not paranoid about getting married and having children. Identity is not just determined by which school we attend but rather, the provinces we came from*unless, of course, you come from an architecture school,in which case i'd think you're uber-cool*, the dialect we use, the culture we have. It's okay if you want to spend your life manning a coffee shop, cuz as long as you can reasonably provide for your family, that's decent enough. The pressure is just not strong to get that raise, buy that car, get that credit card.. The general motto, as far as I see, is "work to live" and "live and let live."

Now..how could that be? How could Singaporeans have all these things to enjoy and be thankful for and yet still let themselves be so stressed and worried? How could Indonesians see all these deprivations everyday and yet comparatively be more relaxed?

But anyway, I've come to realize that the my background, which is kind of Singaporean kind of Indonesia, can come to my advantage, provided I am shamelessly practical *which often I am*.
So, if I get an A,or do a good job,or get whatever achievement, I bask in front of the approving, adoring eyes of Singaporean society, while when I make a mess, get lower than expected, or fail, I fall back on the Indonesian attitude that it's really not a big deal and that all the standards used to determine I'm a failure are artificial anyway.

Now that's a good middle-ground, don't you think? ;p

It's a small world after all..

Hm...why do I say that?
Just now came back from watching Nuansa 2008 (Great performance, btw, salute to all who worked so hard for the production!), and took the bus together with some friends. So, I started chatting to a girl that I know studies in NUS but whom I'm not very close to..and she was from the same primary school that I was! And possibly my classmate! (ungh...I can't remember her face..my bad...but she knows all the names that I'm mentioning, names of ex-classmates that I remember.) Remarkable, since I moved away from the town where I was born, Semarang, when I was just 9 years old, and afterwards lost contact with all my Semarang friends. Was trying around to find them through social utility websites...and voila! There's one just studying at NUS! Happy, happy, nostalgia-ing about all my primary school and kindergarten experiences..hahaha.. I was quite a trouble-maker, btw... cuz then I wasn't the sweet, innocent bookworm I am now..haha.. I remember I got punished for "fighting" with boys..and once in 3rd grade me and another girl "ambushed" and fought a 6th-grader..and defeated him too! As in..we kinda like just randomnly hammered him till he fell to the floor... Man...I wonder how my friend and that guy is doing now..hahahaha...

Another reason that I think the world got comfortably smaller... Met an exchange student in archi that's also a vegetarian becuz of "i don't want animals to be tortured" reason. Dang! That's the first person I meet who's my age, vegetarian but not related to Buddhism..hahahahaha.. Pretty cool...to get to talk to someone that I'm vegetarian cuz I pity animals and get a respond: "Me too!" Instead of weird silence or suppressed smile..hahaha.. Hm...I like all my friends wholeheartedly, vegetarian or not, but it's just great to be able to connect with someone, with a side of me that not many people understand.

Hm... thinking about my personality... (ok not related to the blogpost...forgive me on this digression...).. I think it's shaped a lot by the fact that I moved houses quite often from an early age. I've moved house more than 20 times though I've only moved city 3 times - grew up in Semarang till I'm 9yrs old, moved to Pekanbaru till I'm 13, and came to Singapore till now. (btw if anyone moved house as much as me do contact me, I want to chat to somebody about it ;p ) So... I'm really used to adjusting to new environments and leaving familiar ones.. which resulted in me being easily getting to know people and being friendly, but also easily 'forgetting' people especially if I don't see them a lot anymore. (That is, except for very few people who left permanent imprints on my life.) Being blatantly narcissistic, I'd say I am a fascinating mix (fascinating for myself, of course) between a friendly, over-confident, funny (at least, trying to be...) person and a fiercely private person that needs a lot of time for solitude... I used to struggle with the question, which one is the real me, and am I presenting a fake front to the wolrd, but well... I've since accepted that I'm both..the two sides of me are real ,that my personality just changes according to circumstances and the people I'm with, and that there's nothing really bizarre or shameful about that. (or is there?)

In any case... had a "revelation" today about why my favorite place is the library.. It's just an amazing place, really, in the sense that it's a public place but it's also a very private space as well. You don't go to the library to interact, to see others, to "hang out" (well I do hang out in the library..but let's skip that..).. you just open your book, and there you go, you have your own world and your own space and no one will disturb you. It's funny how I like to strike up random conversations with people in the lift, bus stop, malls, but never, never in the library eventhough it's the place I visit most often. It has to do with maintaining the impression of a "private space" in the midst of a crowd. Just the way I like it.

Outing at Labrador Park

Went to Labrador Park with the ISCF people...very nice place, very romantic too, too bad there were so many ants..haha.. that aside, the place is pretty amazing cuz it combines two of my favorite natural places- a forest and a rocky beach (you get to see more creatures in rocky beaches than sandy beaches). Below are the pics I took...admittedly, lately I'm kinda lazy to write so this blog will temporarily be a photo blog...

Play time!

Went to visit the site for the current project with my studio...Love it! It's a small park called Mount Emily Park (can google-earth it) and it's one of the highest points in Singapore.
Anyway....the best when we went to visit was the weather..overcast sky but not raining at all. And so...all the complications of site survey were forgotten and we focused on the small, white-sanded (yup the sand's white! so nice!) playground that was there. Time to let loose our suppressed inner children!

Now, if only "site survey" can be like this every time....

PR and loving it!

Wen to the library to renew my library membership 2 days ago..and found out that a PR only pays half the fee compared to foreigners!!! Granted the savings only amounts to $10 per year, but since I intend to continue my membership till the day I die, and my life expectation is 85 years,it's still a tidy sum.

The funny thing is, the conversation went like this:
Librarian (L) : "Oh so you are a PR now? I need to update the database. And you only need to pay $10"
me: "Oh,cool!"
*Librarian did her stuff. Me watched and think Singapore government is good for giving PRs half-fee.*
*Librarian finished doing her stuff. Me happily took out cashcard.*
L: "Oh by the way, you have some fines. Do you want to pay at once?"
Me: "Yah , sure."
L: "Alright. Here's the amount you owe while you were still a foreigner.."
Me: " ......" *realisation hits that my status in Singapore is officially not foreigner anymore..*

Hm....feels a bit weird...not a foreigner,but not citizen either...a rather convenient arrangement, I'd say. Ah well, as long as PR perks are extended to National Library Board (THE institution that matters!), me is contented!

Good Old Ubin

Went to Pulau Ubin today with a JC ex-classmate. (name's L, cuz I don't wanna keep referring to him later in the post as 'JC ex-classmate'.) Reason going? Wanted to get away from the fast-paced mainland life, as well as check out the site where I fell down flat on my face last time... (Didnt get to do it though, was too tired after walking up-downslope for sometime.)

For the ignorant, Pulau Ubin is a tiny little island on the North (Northeast?) part of Sg, and it houses the supposedly most biologically diverse spot in Sg, Chek Java. Which is the purpose of our visit today. Expected the trip to be just like usual short trek trips, but turned out I got a few cool surprises.

For one, there is a statue of Cookie Monster near one of the shops.. (I put the trip photos on friendster)...what's Cookie Monster doing in Ubin?? Saw some 'wildlife' (hm....somehow, seeing as Ubin is still part of Sg, the term wildlife juz kinda dont fit...) - a really BIG mudskipper, wild cotton tree ('kapuk'), some birds including one that's nestling inside a hole on a tree..n hid when I wanted to take photo :'( There were the usual suspects - various large insects, monitor lizard, fish, crabs,wild durian and rambutan trees...I got to show off my knowledge of rambutans since my companion, a Sg city boy, didn't know much about them.. I meanwhile, previously stayed in a house facing a rambutan plantation.. (Gitu aja bangga...huehehe..)

When we reached Chek Java, it was rather disappointing cuz the high tide's coming and we can't see anything except blue-green water :'( Moral of the story: check for tide level first in NParks website before coming to Ubin. Only during low tide will you be able to see the famed biodiversity rich lowland. Nevertheless, the sea was charmingly blue and it was nicely breezy n we took a walk along the newly constructed boardwalk around the beach and mangrove swamp area.

The suprise came in the form of a small house standing near the beach, a Tudor-style little cotttage, to be exact. I almost couldn't believe my eyes, becuz...wad's a European-style cottage doing in Pulau Ubin???!! Nevertheless the architecture student in me was so excited =) The cottage was built in the 1930s by some British people, and now houses the Chek Java visitor information center. It also houses the only functioning fireplace in Sg,by the way... not that there's need to use it with the sun shining down a tad too generously... Overall, though, the house is a little beauty and for me became the highlight of today's trip ;p (L says they might be incorporating a cafe into it. Yay!) I guess it's not so much the architectural merits of the building as being able to find it in the most unexpected of places.

Oh yeah, I know why Sg is such a popular destination with the ladies: you can find 5-star-totally-clean-sitting-type-perfectly-working-flush-system toilets in the ulu-est of places..there were several cubicles near the cottage that would fit just nice inside a shopping center..kudos to Sg for this one.

Walked back to Ubin jetty n met quite a lot of people cycling...n apparently I haven't lost my somewhat phobia of cycling since the accident cuz each time I see people cycling downslope with wheels whirling and hair flailing, all I could think about was whether or not the person's gonna crash.... Thanks L for giving me lotsa tips and explaining to me the merits of various bycicle gears...I really need to start practicing...

So, went back to the mainland and had the Famous Changi Village Nasi Lemak for lunch... was good, the nasi, fried egg and sambal (Dont ask me about the chicken and ikan bilis...willingly exchanged those for L's cucumber.) BUT I had my first taste of Air Bandung (actually quite a popular drink in Sg but somehow never got to try it)....and it was SO GOOD!!!! I love it. Which intrigues and irritates me. How can something that is SO PINK tastes so DIVINE??!! and how can I like something that's so pink :'( It's definitely on my fave drinks list starting now, though!

In closing, here's a small part of my conversation with my friend amongst those rubber trees:
me: "Oh dude, I really want some cold drinks right now..."
L: "You should get some compressed liquid nitrogen."
me: "....."
Juz as I am losing hope, things happen that reminds me.... Lame jokes rulez!!! ;p

To be or not to be (a PR), that is the question..

In a bid to increase its citizenship by 4 million - I forgot by when - Singapore is now seducing more foreigners to anchor themselves onto its soil. As a consequence, my hostel is flooded with letters asking us to consider becoming PR (Permanent Resident). As a further consequence, I had lunch with my mom where she painstakingly describes the merits of being a PR and the demerits of being Indonesian. (Since I've always been against her plan of making me get a PR.) The conversation went from how SBY can no longer handle Indonesia, to various scandals involving Indonesian ministers and businessmen. (In Indonesia, these two are sinonymous with greed and corruption.) Mom's cases in point:

1. Recent investigations into the Sidoarjo mud scandal, where hot sulphur mud just devours entire villages, reveals that it is caused by greedy businessmen (of PT Lapindo) cutting cost by using less steel pipes and mechanisms. However, though this callousness costs many human lives, the perpetrators will get away since they have connections in the government. Cliche.

2. Continuing the Suharto family saga (in case you dont know, there was a time they owned everything Indonesian, including airports, roads, water, land, buildings...well, everything..) trillion rupiahs of money from Tommy Suharto's Swiss account, swindled from the average honest, hard-working, poor to middle-class Indonesians, has apparently just moved hand to another corrupt minister. Can anything be done? Nope, the minister's got ties to some other big daddies.

3. It was also recently revealed that in IPDN (Institut Pendidikan Dalam Negeri - National Education Institue), where one studies to become government officers, 47 Christian students have died due to violence during "ragging"...I mean, 1 junior versus 50 seniors, and it's called ragging?? Apparently, the school covers up the deaths for quite sometime already (how else could they reach a high of 47 victims), and even sent warning to a teacher that dared voice opinion on this. IPDN now stands for Institut Pemukulan Dalam Negeri. (National Beatings Institute).

From there, my mom went on to talk about various conflicts, safety and security issues, economic downturns, and how we Chinese are mere second class citizens. However hard we work, whatever we own and achieve, all that can be taken away from us in mere minutes, just because we are of Chinese descent. She talked on how I should take the PR, just to have a country to stay in, since political turmoil might turn Indonesia upside down very soon.

I know I'm a second class Indonesian citizen. In fact, since I'm Chinese and Christian at the same time, you can call me doubly-marginalised. (Hm, good thing I crashed some Arts lectures. Handy terms.) But well...wouldn't I still be a second-class citizen in Singapore if I accept a PR? Then again, 2nd class Singaporean citizen means you pay a slightly higher school fee, miss out on some perks, but otherwise Big Bro takes care of you; 2nd class Indonesian citizen means my possibility of being raped, robbed and killed roughly triples. Hmm..

I love Indonesia. Its literature, its Nature, its culture, its language, its songs, its instruments, even its people. And that is why even just taking a PR makes me feel like I've betrayed my country. But what does it matter if all my society sees of me now is my slit eyes and yellow skin? What does it say about a country when it is made up of 13 667 islands and its citizens cant even safely step out of the house?

Ah well, PR then? I dont know....

Kembalikan Indonesiaku padaku. Meskipun aku keturunan Cina....