Injury...

"He divines remedies against injuries, he knows how to turn serious accidents to his own advantage; whatever does not kill him makes him stronger. "
- Frederich Nietzsche

Hufh.. Trying to practice handstand last night and fell on my left knee and toe.. Juz came back from x-ray-ing it and thankfully just a sprain.

Still, it's a very irritating, saddening, maddening feeling to see people doing all kinds of things with their bodies and I'm stuck on the side watching.. I've always been a somewhat reckless person, so yeah injuries like this reminds me not to be so reckless, because it may well cause me my freedom.. Now that I love moving around so much, I love the way my body is getting stronger and more flexible, I love pushing the limits of what it can do and even loves having muscle fatigue on places I've never had muscle fatigue before.. I am so, very afraid of having all that taken away from me..

Yesterday when I fell on my knee, it was very painful in the beginning, and I was, like, "Please, God, not my knee.. I know sometimes I am more happy to go to capoeira training than to church.. but please, don't teach me a lesson this way..." while imagining all kinds of handicapped-for-life scenarios.. Classic run-to-God-when-there's-a-problem case.. but yeah, having my physical freedom compromised or taken away definitely ranks up there as one of my worst fears..

That said, you know somehow when you're doing something kinda dangerous you're sure that accidents will happen but you're not sure when, so you're just kind of holding yourself back when doing everything.. thinking "will it be this time? will it be when I'm doing this move?"

Well, in a way with this injury I feel like a kind of curse has been lifted hahaha.. And I won't have that kind of fear another time =D

Oh well, now I'll just hope I'll stop walking like a penguin sometimes soon..