How to make a model *WARNING MATURE CONTENT (VIOL

Step-by-step instruction on how to do a model, wtih live commentary from inside the author's mind..

"...uhhh.....it's time to make the model....ok let's prepare the materials...."
*take out cardboard, glue, knife, ruler etc, then stare at drawings for a long time...*
"....Hi...it's you again....haih.....alright let's try to make it as fast and painless as possible....hmm before that I need to modify the floor plan...the stairs are too steep...hmm never mind I'm not the one going up there..and this part under the glass dome will be bloody hot..oh well there's air conditioning...and this part here that's 10 m high glass wall....let's leave that to the civil engineer...ok now we can start..."
*take scissors and start cutting out floorplan..*
"ufh i need to make little columns from bristle board so the model will be detailed...how big should they be..."
*start daydreaming....*
"Ouch!"
*accidentally poked finger with scissor blade.. see tiny droplet of blood, get fascinated....*
"Oh man...maybe if I poke my neck with the scissors I don't have to do submission...all that blood will spurt over the white bristle board....how beautiful..and I don't have to live to admit I've designed this ugly building....ooohh..... oh shoot! what am I thinking! Focus dude, focus!"
*Finish cutting the floorplan..then take glue spray to stick floor plans to cardboard*
"Thank goodness for spray mount...oh wait, what's this written here..? Highly flammable? Oh..."
*Imagining putting all the cardboard pieces around the stove, then swtich the fire on, the spray the glue on it....KABOOM! Pretty little mushroom cloud perhaps, and no more submission.....muahahahahha.....*
"FOCUS DUDE! alright, alright...next..."
*cut out the cardboards according to the shape of the plans*
"Ha...am glad this x-acto knife is so sharp, if not the cut will not be so deep and clean....hm...deep and clean....."
*...looks at wrist...looks at x-acto knife...looks at wrist again... wonder if the cut will be deep and clean enough to minimise the pain...*
"AS I SAID, FOCUS!!! DO YOU OR DO YOU NOT WANT TO FINISH THE MODEL??!! ok,ok...next..."
*cut out cardboard strips to use as wall; take white glue to glue the wall to the floor plan; cannot help but smell the white glue and savor the sickeningly sweet smell.....*
"Hmmmm....mmmm.....hm...I wonder if glue-sniffing will cause enough brain damage so I can claim
mental illness ...oh ya, f****** said for the most-impact we must use liquid acrylic glue, pour into plastic bag, then put our nose inside the bag carefully so no vapor can escape...then breathe in...breathe out.....hmm do I still have acrylic glue....."
"AND WHY WOULD YOU WANT TO DO THAT TO THIS PRECIOUS LITTLE BRAIN OF YOURS WHO IS YOUR PRIMARY SOURCE OF ENTERTAINMENT IN LIFE??!!! DO YOU NOT LOVE ME ANYMORE??!! I'M MAD! MAD! HUMPH!!"
"Ooops....ok,ok, my precious little brain, I'm really really sorry.....won't even think of that ever again...pinky promise...?"
*realised that instead of gluing the walls I've been hallucinating....*
"Oh well, starting to look quite good actually....Hmm.... ok let's just continue tomorrow..."
*Go into room, switch on computer and write on blog, leaving poor unfinished model on the table, alone....without so much as a study model to keep it company...oh poor little model....hiks..hiks..sniff...hiks..hiks.....*
_____

3 weeks from now on, after submission is done and my mind is clear, I'd probably look back and wonder how I could've written such rubbish..
But for now, it feels good to channel all my murderous intent into writing.......

Aaaaaahhhhhhh. . . . . . . . . . . . . .